Have The Spark
by Afroson
Summary: Mirage and Ratchet are trying to have a sparkling of their own, but there is something wrong. And Ratchet is lying to him about it but what else is he lying about? Would it drain their marriage? Or would they be able to have something they dreamed of? Ratchet/Mirage
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So, this is the story of Ratchet and Mirage before the war. Jazz and Blaster aren't in this.

Question of the chapter: Who is your favourite transformer?

I like Optimus, Prowl, Jazz and Ratchet...they are #1 for me

Disclaimer: Don't own Transformers

Chapter 1

 _S_ _lag it,_ Mirage sighed to himself as he waited in the med bay while the medic was going over his file. Red Cross, was one of the best medics, besides Ratchet-Mirage's sparkmate- was the only one he can trust. Especially with this. He couldn't bare going to Ratchet the second time, get tested and see the hurt and grieving look in his optics when he came back with the news.

Red Cross put down the file, sighing. "Mirage-"

"Don't. Please don't." Mirage interrupted the medic. He knew what he was going to say, he didn't want to hear the words. "I know. I know."

Red Cross looked at him, giving a small nod. "Would you like me to get Ratchet?"

"No," he said. "He doesn't know I'm here. I couldn't let him find it out on himself." Red Cross gave another small nod. He knew about the first time, when after Mirage left the med bay, Ratchet was still there, crying to himslef. He knew how badly Mirage wanted a sparkling of his own, so has Ratchet but now...

"You can stay in here and rest a bit if you'd like," Red Cross offered as he put Mirage's file away.

Mirage hummed sadly. "No, I-I think I'm just going to head home." He got off the berth. "If that's okay."

Red Cross hugged him. "Of course. I'll send Ratchet home in a couple of joors."

"Thank you," he said before leaving the med bay.

_(Transformers Transition)_

Mirage walked around Autobot City; he wanted to go somewhere, he needed to go somewhere. He didn't want to go home right away, or maybe he did. He didn't know what he felt, all he felt was numbness. _Second miscarriage,_ he thought to himself. _He's going to leave. Ratchet's going to leave._

Mirage had found himself standing outside his place. He went inside, even though he didn't want to. He looked at the clean-freaked place and all he could picture was a sparkling- his and Ratchet's _sparkling_ \- running around, creating a mess every where. He could picture the medic chasing the sparkling and cleaning the mess and mumbling to himself about he wanted, everything he needed was just all he could picture and couldn't have. Mirage walked to the spare quarters that they cleared out the first time when he found out he was carrying. They kept it cleared out even the first miscarriage, now he wasn't sure if they were going to leave it like this. It would have been their sparkling's quarter.

Mirage went to his and Ratchet's quarters where he sat on the berth and cried his spark out.

_(Transformers Transition)_

Ratchet was starting to become cranky with his patients. No, he was getting worse...medic cranky. It wasn't his patients fault; they weren't refusing him...it was who they were. Optimus, Ironhide, Prowl, Bulkhead, Arcee, Chromia, Elita and Inferno were all at his med-section all covered with dents.

"All of you are idiots," he mumbled as he first worked on Arcee.

Ironhide chuckled. "It wasn't our fault."

"It wasn't _our_ fault," Prowl agreed. "It was _their_ fault. Not _mine._ "

"What were you all doing anyways?" Ratchet asked, curious.

"Trying to hook Prowl up with someone," Chromia said. "He's too strict and needs to lay back. So we set him up with someone and we tagged along. Everything went fine," She then looked at Optimus, Ironhide and Bulkhead, "until those three decided they were going to play a game. They lost control and took everyone down with them."

"I couldn't help if I lost my balance," Bulkhead admitted. "We can't be still like Prowl."

Ratchet turned his attention to Prowl. "How did the date go before all that happened?"

"It was okay."

"Who was it with?"

"Bluestreak."

Ratchet chuckled. "He is a good engineer if you need him. Him and Wheeljack."

"Indeed."

"How's Mirage?" Elita asked Ratchet. Ratchet sighed. They all knew about the first carrying, about how he miscarried and was worried about him. And now that he was carrying again, him and Ratchet were scared.

"He's holding on. The first time took a toll on him, now he's being cautious about everything." It must've been liked Primus was watching over him when Red Cross entered Ratchet's area. Usually, when Red Cross goes in Ratchet's area, it's usually for a meeting or an emergency. Ratchet raised an optic ridge at him. "Can I help you, Cross?"

"I was wondering if I can chat to you in private," Red Cross said.

Ratchet looked between Cross and his patients. "Sure." He followed Red Cross out his medbay and to somewhere private. "What's wrong?"

"Mirage came to see me today," Red Cross sighed. He didn't want to tell his medical partner that his mate miscarried. He remembered the first time Mirage miscarried, he found Ratchet in his office, drinking high energon, crying to himself. All he kept mumbling was something about how much Mirage is going to hate him once he found out. Ratchet offlined his optics. "He...he had another...miscarriage."

Ratchet sighed, shakily. "Where is he?"

"He went home."

With that Ratchet nodded at his friend before walking past him. He knew he had to get home; he had to go comfort his sparkmate. Not only comfort, but he knew Mirage deserves to know the truth. He deserves to know why he couldn't...

 _Slag it all._

A/N: So how was that? I think that went well


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Enjoy

Chapter 2

Ratchet wanted to hurry his aft home to go comfort his mate but at the same time he wanted to avoid going home. He knew he was going to see Mirage crying his spark out, feeling miserable and blaming himself like he did the first time. However, he ended up home: home and unsure. So many thoughts were running through his processor. He could tell Mirage the truth- the truth of why he couldn't be successful of carrying. As a medic, his patients had the right to know what was wrong with them. He had to care for them, try to fix whatever the problem is the best he could. On the other note, as a sparkmate, he wanted to keep whatever that could devastate Mirage away from him. The sparkmate dominated the medic in so many ways that it hurting him that he had to keep it a secret.

He entered his home, following his spark pulses to his and Mirage's quarters. The sight of his sparkmate crying his spark out in front of him made him feel awful, made him feel like he failed. He laid on the berth beside him, pulling him into his arms.

"I-I'm s-s-s-s-sor-ry," Mirage sobbed out, making Ratchet hold him tighter.

"It's not your fault,dearspark," Ratchet tried to keep his voice steady without any signs of breaking down. He felt both the medic and the sparkmate sides of him fighting on what to do. The sparkmate just wanted to comfort him while the medic wanted to check him. His medic side won. "Are you hurting anywheres?"

"N-no."

Ratchet quietly did a scan, just in case. He found nothing that could cause him harm which he was relieved with that. He planted a kiss on top of Mirage's helm, he was going to help him through the grieving first before he did his.

_(Mirage Transition)_

Ratchet onlined his optics, he didn't remember falling into I might've needed that. He looked over to see his mate in recharge, he shifted slightly, just to get Mirage off his completely numbed arm. The medic did wish he was still in recharge, though he heard knocking on the door. Ratchet got off the berth without waking his mate and went to the front door. He was hoping that he wouldn't get any visitors but on the other hand he wanted his friends to show up. Especially Mirage's cousin, Red Alert.

He opened the door to see his friends there without their dents. He made a mental note to thank Red Cross when he went back to work. "Hi," he said tiredly.

"Are you okay?" Prowl asked, as the medic moved to the side for them to enter.

Ratchet sighed. "Mirage miscarried again." He rubbed his helm as the others were looking at him with sadness. "He's taking this hard."

"You know if you two need anything, you can always let us know," Elita said.

Ratchet nodded. :Ratchet to Red Alert. Are you available?:

:Yeah, I'm home with Inferno. Why?:

Ratchet stared at them. "So I see you all got your idiotic dents out," he said.

Optimus chuckled. "Red Cross had trouble with Bulkhead and Ironhide. He's just like you when you curse off at us."

"I learned it from him." :Mirage miscarried again. Wondering you can come over and get his mind off of it for a bit: Ratchet crossed across the room in silence, his processor the first time in a while, his processor was absolutely didn't know what to think of, what to run through his processor at the time.

:I'll take him out somewhere. I'll be there soon. Red Alert out.: Ratchet felt Red Alert cut the comm link. He was relieved that Red Alert was going to take Mirage out, Ratchet could really use some private time to go over some things.

_(Mirage Transition)_

Mirage onlined when he didn't feel Ratchet beside him anymore. He could hear voices somewhere in his house. He got up and placed a hand on his spark, he winced at knowing that his sparkling was gone. He got up and left his quarters to see who exactly was in his home. He found the gang there, talking to Ratchet. He stood in the doorway, debating whether or not he wanted to join in but when Ratchet looked up and their optics conncected, he decided to he will join for a bit.

"Darling." Ratchet only used endearments when they were either alone or if they were with the bots that they know. The others looked up to see Mirage standing there and gave him a small smile. "Did we wake you?"

"No," he lied. "I was getting hungry." I didn't feel you beside me anymore. He wanted to say that but he didn't want to be clingy, especially when this was hitting Ratchet hard as well. He turned to the gang. "Hey."

"Hey Mirage," Arcee got up, giving him a hug. "How are you feeling?"

Completely and utterly awful. "Okay, for now," he said. He knew Ratchet told them about this miscarriage, he didn't care. These bots were family to him , however, he still doubted Ratchet. Eventually, after an x-amount of miscarriages, Ratchet will leave to go with some bot that can carry. "How was your day?" he asked, trying to engage himself.

"Well," Chromia laughed as she explained everything that happened from the time that Prowl had his date with Bluestreak to the game that they were playing and ended up going to the medbay to get the dents out.

Mirage raised an optic ridge. "Bluestreak? Really?" He questioned Prowl.

"I had nothing to do with it," Prowl grumbled.

Bluestreak was a fine, hard-working mech. He was another Praxian just like Prowl but unlike Prowl, Bluestreak nows how to relax and interact. Who knew a hard working mech as Bluestreak would be into art. "Sounds like a good match for you," Mirage lightly joked.

"Not my type," Prowl stated. "Plus I do not need a mate."

There was a knock on the door and Ratchet got up. Mirage watch his mate that had a small smile on his face plate go to the door. Mirage turned his attention to his guests whom were bickering at each other, like always. Arcee, Chromia and Elita were talking about Primus knows what while Bulkhead and Ironhide talk weapons. Optimus and Prowl were just having a staring contest...which they do about five times an orn. Prowl always win. "Red Alert. Inferno." He heard Ratchet faintly greet the two other bots before the medic brought them where the others were.

Mirage perked up when he seen his cousin. Red Alert went over and gave him a hug. Inferno just waved at him and glared with hatred at the others, he still wasn't happy that they caused him to have dents on him. And worse, when he told Red, Red said that they weren't fraggin' for a bit until he learns his lesson." Well, look at the troublemakers," Red Alert smirked. He quickly glanced at Ratchet before going to Mirage, "Mirage, I 'm going to the Cyrstal Forest, want to come with?"

Mirage hesitated. "I s-suppose."

"Excellent!" Red Alert chirped before grabbing his cousin's hand and drag him out the door.

_(Inferno Transition)_

After Red and Mirage left, Prowl said his goodbyes and after a bit so did the others. Ratchet was now alone and was finally able to have some high energon. He had his helm in his hands, _what am I to do?_

A/n: Will Ratchet ever tell Mirage?


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: XD

Disclaimer: Don't own TF

Chapter 3

 _M_ _irage landed quietly on the edge next to Blurr, his team-mate. They had been called in for a mission-well, Mirage was anyways- Blurr was still on the job. Mirage, he was in the early stage of carrying a sparkling. Ratchet and Mirage already cleared out a quarter for their soon to be sparkling and was excited to become Creators. Unfortunately, Mirage was called in a mission because they were short on bots to go to Shockwave's lab and the only one who was available to go was Blurr. Sure Mirage wasn't happy about the call, neither was Ratchet, but there was no way Mirage was letting his friend go to Shockwave's lab alone, and have a huge chance of not making out alive. So Mirage decided that he'll go but made a strict demand that he'll get extra credits for going._

 _"_ _I'll distract, you get the information,"Blurr said. Mirage nodded as he turned invisible, both jumping down at the same time. Mirage made his way to the computer while Blurr had already gotten Shockwave's attention. Mirage opened up his downloading file and began the process of downloading Shockwave's experiment files in his hard drive. Blurr was running past, knocking Shockwave down, then letting him get back up before he does something else again._

 _Blurr went to go attack again but Shockwave got the upper hand, hitting him hard enough to make him fly back and smash against the wall. Blurr came crashing down, unconscious. Mirage looked back to see his team mate injured and Shockwave was loading up his gun making his way towards the unconscious Autobot. Mirage ran and tackled the Deception. Shockwave tried to force himself free from whatever the invisible thing was that was holding him down. Mirage held him down, still invisible, and hoping for Blurr to online again._

 _Shockwave was still struggling until he did something. He mentally communicated with his computer that was controlling a shock lazar. When Blurr finally came online, he was dizzy, he tried to focus on Shockwave and why he was down._

 _Mirage was still holding onto the Deception. None of the two Autobots noticed the shock lazar until it was too late. Shockwave mentally turned it on and it shot at Mirage. The lazar shocked Mirage, causing him to turn visible and making him a scream on the top of his lungs. Blurr forced himself to focus and ran to the computer while Shockwave pushed Mirage off of him. He turned off the computer, by the time he turned around, Shockwave was already making his way out the door. The lazar stopped and Mirage stopped screaming and collapsed._

 _"_ _Mirage!" Blurr ran to him and dropped down by his side. Mirage was unconscious and not at all in a good condition. "Slag." Blurr picked up Mirage and ran. He was running back to Autobot City, back to Ratchet._

 _-_(Shockwave Transition)__

 _Ratchet was frowning at the two medics in front of him. Red Cross- Ratchet's medical partner and boss- and Inferno- Mirage's cousin husband and a sparkling/youngling medic- was laughing at him because he wasn't paying attention to where he was going and ran smack in the wall. "It's not funny!" Ratchet growled._

 _"_ _Are you going to be like that when your sparkling comes?" Red Cross chuckled. "Running into doors?"_

 _Ratchet growled again, throwing a wrench at him, which Red absolutely missed and it hit Inferno. "Ouch," was all Inferno said, rubbing his helm. "Stop that."_

 _Ratchet waved off whatever Inferno said._

 _"_ _So, how's Mirage doing?" Inferno asked, as he took a seat._

 _"_ _Good," Ratchet said. "We cleaned out a quarter not that long ago. He has another check up coming up."_

 _Red Cross smiled. "Ah, I remember when Wingflare was carrying. His cravings and emotions were at an all time high. Especially his se-"_

 _"_ _NO!" Inferno interrupted. "I rather not here about your sex life."_

 _Red Cross stared at him. "I wasn't mentioning it." He smiled. "However, I can tell you how amazing Wingflare is in be-"_

 _"_ _NO!" Inferno waved him off. "No, no."_

 _Ratchet chuckled. "Well, when you and Red Alert decide to have a sparkling of your own, you'll be bragging about your interfacing life."_

 _Inferno groaned, putting his helm in his palm. "I rather not."_

 _Red Cross laughed. "You say th-"_

 _"_ _ **MEDICAL EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY SURGERY!**_ **"** _The medical alert system went off, making Red Cross and Ratchet jump to their feet and taking off. "_ _ **C-843 EMERGENCY!**_ **"** _Inferno jumped to his feet and chased after the older medics down the hall. C-843 meant that the Carrier and the unborn sparkling would both die if nothing is done._

 _The three of them quickly got the surgical room all ready before Blurr came rushing in, carrying Mirage, obviously he ignored the other medical bots when he entered. Ratchet felt numbness wash over him as he watched Blurr put Mirage down on the medical berth, before being taken out by a nurse. Mirage had scratches and some signs of being shocked and he was bleeding out energon. Inferno quickly checked Mirage's and the unborn sparkling's pulse. "Both pulses are in distress," Inferno said._

 _Red Cross was checking out the severe injury before putting pressure on it to hold the bleeding, he looked to Ratchet. "He's losing too much energon, Ratchet. We're going to lose both of them if you don't make a choice."_

 _Ratchet just stared at Mirage. He hadn't even move a joint when he watched his mate be laid on the medical berth. His processor was completely blank; he couldn't process anything through. "RATCHET!" Red Cross shouted, finally snapping the other medic out._

 _Ratchet sucked in a breath. He all ready made up his processor and right now, it was for the best. "Save Mirage."_

 __(Transformers Transitions)__

 _It took a bit to finish the surgery for Mirage. Red Cross went to go talk to Blurr to let him know how his teammate was doing, Inferno went back to his ward and called Red Alert who probably wouldn't get the message until he was on break. And Ratchet… he sat beside Mirage in the recovery. He wanted to be there when he woke up, he had to find away to tell Mirage that…that in order to….. in order to save his life….his life…_

 _Ratchet offlined his optics, thinking a possible way to tell him._ _ **:Ratchet to Red Cross. Can you come in and delivery the news?:**_ _He sent the comm. A couple of kliks passed before he felt Mirage's hand move which he quickly onlined his optics. Mirage stirred before coming online, he looked around the room, before up at Ratchet. "My sweet spark, how are you feeling?"_

 _"_ _Sore."_

 _ **:I'll be there momentarily. Red Cross out.:**_

 _Ratchet rubbed and squeezed Mirage's hand. "Understandable."_

 _Mirage tried to sit up, realizing how much it hurt, he laid back down. "Where's Blurr? Did he make it out okay?"_

 _"_ _He's fine. He was more freaked out about you."_

 _Right on cue, Red Cross came in, which Ratchet was very grateful. Red Cross gave a friendly smile to the both of them. "How are you feeling, Mirage?"_

 _"_ _Sore."_

 _Red Cross nodded. "The surgery took quite a while. You were losing a lot of energon before we could replace it."_

 _"_ _Work accident," he sighed. "So, you when you did the surgery, you had to take out my sparkling. The sparkling is in the incubator, right?"_

 _Ratchet felt his spark-break. "Mirage…"_

 _"_ _Femme or mechling?"_

 _Ratchet squeezed his mate's hand tighter. Red Cross cleared his vocal processor. "Mirage, I don't know how to say this but I'll tell you as I told Ratchet. The damage was to bad to save the both of you." Mirage went still. "In order to save you, we had to exterminate the sparkling. I'm so sorry."_

 _Ratchet held his breath, waiting for Mirage to freak, but he did nothing. Mirage was just still and silent. "My sparkling's gone," Mirage whispered to himself. He kept whispering it to himself over and over again. Red Cross looked to Ratchet ._ _ **:I believe it's best if Mirage didn't find out for a while.:**_

 **** ** _:I think you're right:_** _Red Cross left the room._

 _Ratchet gently climbed beside Mirage, comforting him. Mirage let out a choke sob, and Ratchet held him close, shedding a few unknown tears too._

 _a/n: Damn, I'm such an awful person to Mirage and Ratchet_


End file.
